Thoughts on Failure, Movement to the Future.

I don't think a single person like the thought of failure; I know I don't.

But, there is something about the act of failing that I think is necessary. This doesn't mean that you SHOULD go looking for failure, but go looking for how to be better.

Failure is what makes a person determined to succeed, to try again, right?

That statement was not one that I easily came to, Dear Readers. If you had asked me what I thought if failure three years ago, or as far back as 2010 (that's seven years ago), I would have told told you that failure is the worst thing in the world. That it was a sign that you probably should try something else. That you weren't good enough. Maybe that you (or myself since I am talking about a specific thing) weren't cut out for what ever it was you (or I) failed at.

Something else to consider, Dear Readers; that failure makes us see what we are really good at and pushes us to makes those things, those talents stronger. I mean, I have been a writer, and poet since high school, but it wasn't until sometime after 2010 that I actually felt like I was a writer. I think it is because I never really failed at writing up until that point, or maybe never really tried to be a writer. Could even be both, as it amounts to the same thing; I never tried to published my writing, I never revised my writing, I never put my writing out in the world for others to read.

The only difference from that time  in the late 90s to to the present (2018) is that I've failed. I've failed to meet deadlines. Failed to win a contest; failed to revised a piece of writing; failed to edited a piece of writing properly; or failed to achieve funding on a Kickstarter project, twice.

What I HAVE done is to show my writing to my editor. I have one now; to take his suggestions; to let others read my writing, not just as a casual reader, but as Beta Readers, with the harsher criticisms that comes with having Beta Readers. I tried new ways of revising and editing; actually seeing my writing, my stories, from the Objective, not Subjective viewpoint; submitting my writing to online journals, contests, and putting my writing online for others to read; or even trying to Kickstarter funds to , GASP, self-publish my own literary magazine.

I have failed a lot.

But, I have also succeeded!

My first Kickstarter back in January of THIS YEAR, failed to make funding, but I was given some advise and suggestions about promoting the project, time of year to run the project, and content of said project. So, I tried again in April. While I was re-structuring my Kickstarter, I tried something new, I developed a PDF version of the literary magazine to see if it could be done with the resources I had available. It was! I raised funding for the first two issues of what became my literary magazine, "Stories to be Told".

Now, when I thought I had it figured out, I didn't. It appears my third time up to bat at Kickstartering was ALSO a failure. But it wasn't for naught, because  this summer I began to think about how I more a sustainable means to fund my projects, whether it was more issues of "Stories to be Told", or maybe launch my children's books, or my podcast I had been developing. I have so many stories, both completed and incomplete, of stories, poems, or plays laying around that I could certainly keep the mantle of Writer (with a capital W).

This is what I wanted to do with my life; I wanted to write stories, tell stories, and share them with the world.

All this means, Dear Reader is that I have to fail sometimes, well, I have to fail a lot. Sometimes I have to struggle. A fan base, a readership doesn't start out like a Neil Gaiman or a Stephen King, heck it doesn't even start out like an Emily Dickenson, J.R.R. Tolkien, or C.S Lewis for that matter. When you are an Unknown, you have to start at the bottom. You have to build your trust and interest. Sometimes your Twitter followers will increase by 1000 overnight, and a week later you'll lose 950 of them. Sometimes you will lose readers just by doing what you normally do, putting out new content, a new newsletter, or just tweeting about a new book from a fellow author; sometimes the muse will not visit you when you are trying to meet a deadline; or sometimes you will feel that all of your talent is a sham, that you were wrong to go into this career.

These are all very real feelings, thoughts, that I and countless other writers have felt at one time or another. The point is to tell you (and myself), that the failures you encounter are there to push you; to test you; to help you be the best writer, chef, stage manager, Literal Video producer, or gamer that you can be. True, it might be that you decide that isn't for you, but maybe, just maybe you'll find that you still want to tell stories, direct plays, produce Literal Videos; you will take your failures and make them successes.

See?

I may have failed at this Kickstarter  for Issue Two of "Stores to be Told", but now I'm launching my Patreon, "My Mythologies" to keep my stories, my literary magazine, podcast, children's books alive. I know I will struggle and likely, I will fail again, but I will also succeed. I have already succeeding in much since I started on this path. I am a stronger writer and a MUCH BETTER business woman than I was in 2017.

Failure, to me, means success, by way of taking the longer road to get where I was going.

If you want to learn more, please check out my Patreon: My Mythologies, my Website, my Soundcloud, and my Youtube Channel for more content. This blog is still up and running. I am in the middle of OctPoWriMo. Here, There be a Writer is evolving, please come back and see whatg I have in store for the future.

Thanks for reading!

Cheers!
~Cindy

OctPoWriMo/ROW80 check-in: 2 for 1

Today's Prompt: Think of a time where you surprised yourself. You set out to do something and you surprised yourself. You weren't even sure if the goal was feasible. Maybe it was something you hadn't done before. Maybe you did it against the advice of family and friends. Perhaps you had to war against your inner doubts to make it happen. But you did it anyway and you did it your way.

Tell us your success story.

Also, come and visit the other poets of OctPoWriMo at the Blog Hop here.

There is a bit of back short here. Back in 2012 I write my first 1 act--a short play of about 5 to 8 pages--for something called 24 Hour Theatre. Many of you, Dear Readers have heard me talk about 24 Hour Theatre. It's theatre in a day. The writers write a script the night before, from around 6/7:00 pm to hopefully by 2/3:00 am. The following day the directors and actors assemble and rehearsal, capping off the day with a performance at the 24th hour (roughly). The casts get to rehearse 8 to 9 hours. It's very much a whirlwind and quite intense, but it is so much fun.

I had performed in my first 24 Hour Theatre the previous year, so when it came around I was ready to jump in and write a show. Except I had never written a show before, and I was definitely scared. I received my cast and started, it was more than a little daunting at first. But after a little bit I utilized some resources and drove right in. I think it helped that I wrote for NaNoWriMo the year before. It was amazing, and when I saw the final product I was even more amazed. It worked and I could do it.

That was my first REAL bout with the FRAUD POLICE (a term from the Amanda Palmer fandom). The amazing feeling I got from writing that show and then seeing it performed was worth it. So, today I decided to write a Nonet using my first success as a playwright.

Poetry Prompt: A Nonet. It is a nine line poem that starts with nine syllable in the first sentence. Each sentence decreases in the number of syllables until you reach one. Rhyme is not required. Dear Readers, I hope you enjoy.

That One Time

The first time that I wrote something that
was not only read, but performed.
I was a wreck at the thought
of failures aplenty.
Would they understand?
Fears unfounded,
audience
applauds.
Score!

Now it's time for ROW80. A Round of Words in 80 Days is a blog Challenge that knows you have a life. Come and see what my fellow ROW80-ers are up to at the Blog Hop.

How am I doing? Well, some way, doing well, other it's a slower start, but I am still making it work. There never seems to be enough hours in the day. But here goes the check-in...

This Week:

      *Editing: The Real Road Trip, I am proud to say I picked up where I left off and figured out my chapters 1 and 2. I write really stream of consciousness and this novel is definitely not in the order it needs to be, but fear not, as I progress through the edits I am making chapter breaks. I sat down for three hours on Saturday. Feeling more promise now and a little less fear. Plan is to have the second draft done by end of the ROund.

      *Reading: finished reading Deep Time: The Glamour Chronicles (Trevor Baxemdale). IT's a Doctor 12 and Clara  story and it feels like a 12 and Clara story, down to the gruffness of Capaldi and the sometimes whining Clara (but it works in this story). Its the first book in a series of book about the Glamour. It a nice, funny read. Started reading Dead Before Dark (Wendy Corsi Staub) a murder mystery suspense novel.

      *Writing: wrote Wednesday's post (744 words) and Writing Blitzed for WIPpet Wednesday ( 800 words), rough draft for ROW80 sponsor post (667 words), wrote my daily OctPoWriMo poems everyday (roughly 200 words for each post). Could have written more. Going to try to spend a little more time writing this week, if possible.

      *Theatre Stuffs: Music Man, have bio sheets typed up (just need to print), printed labels and began stuffed envelopes for sponsor letters, got the schedule figured out sending emails each week to remind the cast what is coming up, and emailed the TV station for and interview in November.

       *Social Media: doing pretty well. I checked in with my sponsor duties and 4 visit to ROW80 everyday and checked in with 2 to 4 OctPoMriMo, and even hit about 2 WIPpeteers during the week. Of course I didn't hit anything Saturday, but that is my unplugged day.

Whew! That's better than I thought.

This (upcoming) Week:

       *Writing: write daily, at least 300 words.

       *Editing: spent time Tuesday and Wednesday on The Real Road Trip.

       *Reading: continue with Dead Before Dark and start my re-read of Inkheart (Cornelia Funke). I see a review of book versus movie in my future.

       *Blogging: didn't do thing last week. Post Tuesday and Thursday.

       *Social Media: 4 blog daily. Submit my sponsor post tomorrow (Monday).

       *Theatre Stuff: report on progress.

       *House Tending: clean!

I saw a movie Friday night. The hubs and I went to see Pan. We were surprised, very pleasantly surprised, by the story and the overall quality. We saw it is 3-D, and it was definitely made to be in 3-D. I love how most of the movie is made of many new faces. It a different take on the Peter Pan story, and as a prequel it brought new elements to the story. I remember when Russell Crow made his Robin Hood, it got bashed by many a movie goers. I really enjoyed it. There was something about hearing about how Robin Hood and Peter Pan came to be. There are too many reboots out there, that when you get a retelling or prequel its more refreshing. If you like high fantasy and a little different slant on a old story, then Pan is a good choice for you. I highly recommend it. 

What movies have you seen lately, Dear Readers? How are your goals coming along?