Thoughts on Failure, Movement to the Future.

I don't think a single person like the thought of failure; I know I don't.

But, there is something about the act of failing that I think is necessary. This doesn't mean that you SHOULD go looking for failure, but go looking for how to be better.

Failure is what makes a person determined to succeed, to try again, right?

That statement was not one that I easily came to, Dear Readers. If you had asked me what I thought if failure three years ago, or as far back as 2010 (that's seven years ago), I would have told told you that failure is the worst thing in the world. That it was a sign that you probably should try something else. That you weren't good enough. Maybe that you (or myself since I am talking about a specific thing) weren't cut out for what ever it was you (or I) failed at.

Something else to consider, Dear Readers; that failure makes us see what we are really good at and pushes us to makes those things, those talents stronger. I mean, I have been a writer, and poet since high school, but it wasn't until sometime after 2010 that I actually felt like I was a writer. I think it is because I never really failed at writing up until that point, or maybe never really tried to be a writer. Could even be both, as it amounts to the same thing; I never tried to published my writing, I never revised my writing, I never put my writing out in the world for others to read.

The only difference from that time  in the late 90s to to the present (2018) is that I've failed. I've failed to meet deadlines. Failed to win a contest; failed to revised a piece of writing; failed to edited a piece of writing properly; or failed to achieve funding on a Kickstarter project, twice.

What I HAVE done is to show my writing to my editor. I have one now; to take his suggestions; to let others read my writing, not just as a casual reader, but as Beta Readers, with the harsher criticisms that comes with having Beta Readers. I tried new ways of revising and editing; actually seeing my writing, my stories, from the Objective, not Subjective viewpoint; submitting my writing to online journals, contests, and putting my writing online for others to read; or even trying to Kickstarter funds to , GASP, self-publish my own literary magazine.

I have failed a lot.

But, I have also succeeded!

My first Kickstarter back in January of THIS YEAR, failed to make funding, but I was given some advise and suggestions about promoting the project, time of year to run the project, and content of said project. So, I tried again in April. While I was re-structuring my Kickstarter, I tried something new, I developed a PDF version of the literary magazine to see if it could be done with the resources I had available. It was! I raised funding for the first two issues of what became my literary magazine, "Stories to be Told".

Now, when I thought I had it figured out, I didn't. It appears my third time up to bat at Kickstartering was ALSO a failure. But it wasn't for naught, because  this summer I began to think about how I more a sustainable means to fund my projects, whether it was more issues of "Stories to be Told", or maybe launch my children's books, or my podcast I had been developing. I have so many stories, both completed and incomplete, of stories, poems, or plays laying around that I could certainly keep the mantle of Writer (with a capital W).

This is what I wanted to do with my life; I wanted to write stories, tell stories, and share them with the world.

All this means, Dear Reader is that I have to fail sometimes, well, I have to fail a lot. Sometimes I have to struggle. A fan base, a readership doesn't start out like a Neil Gaiman or a Stephen King, heck it doesn't even start out like an Emily Dickenson, J.R.R. Tolkien, or C.S Lewis for that matter. When you are an Unknown, you have to start at the bottom. You have to build your trust and interest. Sometimes your Twitter followers will increase by 1000 overnight, and a week later you'll lose 950 of them. Sometimes you will lose readers just by doing what you normally do, putting out new content, a new newsletter, or just tweeting about a new book from a fellow author; sometimes the muse will not visit you when you are trying to meet a deadline; or sometimes you will feel that all of your talent is a sham, that you were wrong to go into this career.

These are all very real feelings, thoughts, that I and countless other writers have felt at one time or another. The point is to tell you (and myself), that the failures you encounter are there to push you; to test you; to help you be the best writer, chef, stage manager, Literal Video producer, or gamer that you can be. True, it might be that you decide that isn't for you, but maybe, just maybe you'll find that you still want to tell stories, direct plays, produce Literal Videos; you will take your failures and make them successes.

See?

I may have failed at this Kickstarter  for Issue Two of "Stores to be Told", but now I'm launching my Patreon, "My Mythologies" to keep my stories, my literary magazine, podcast, children's books alive. I know I will struggle and likely, I will fail again, but I will also succeed. I have already succeeding in much since I started on this path. I am a stronger writer and a MUCH BETTER business woman than I was in 2017.

Failure, to me, means success, by way of taking the longer road to get where I was going.

If you want to learn more, please check out my Patreon: My Mythologies, my Website, my Soundcloud, and my Youtube Channel for more content. This blog is still up and running. I am in the middle of OctPoWriMo. Here, There be a Writer is evolving, please come back and see whatg I have in store for the future.

Thanks for reading!

Cheers!
~Cindy

Kickstarter LIVE! (17 days to go)

It's official! I have a Kickstarter.

I am finally done with waiting around for things to happen. I am going to make things happen. Since 2011 I have wanted to take my writing and getting published more seriously. it was about that time I started submitting stories and poetry to online journals and some contests. I have received A LOT of rejection letters, a couple with constructive criticism (that was sweet of them), but nothing has yielded anything.

I kept trying though, although lately I have not been submitting as much.

It was last year that I realized that I needed to try something different.

First, I asked a fellow local poet friend if there were any local contests I could submit to. This resulted in twice having a selected (years 2016 and 2017) poem in two separate calendars  with featured local photographers.

Then there was a contest for a art and poetry called "The Sexuality Show"  (and The Sexuality Poems book) that featured local artists' work for a gallery showing and poems to be published in the aforementioned book on sexuality and gender. I submitted two poems for consideration. One was picked to be included in a book.

Talk about exciting!

I even got to read my poem at two separate poetry readings.

Talk about being nervous. I was going up against some really talented and well known local poets. But, I did it. And surprise surprise my fellow poets seemed to like my poem.

The story goes since 2011 I have been trying to submit poems and stories to various online journals, more in the last couple of years. The pile of rejection letters has grown. I felt that I wasn't getting anywhere. I was definitely getting discouraged. I was still trying, but not with the same exuberance.

It wasn't until I realized that I wasn't planning how I was submitting my poems and/or stories. I was being random in my selection of works, ad not being consistent. So, I started selecting certain works and kept submitting those. Again, more rejection and I wasn't getting anyway. I know rejection is part of the deal. Still its hard to not have my writing out there, which is the reason I became writer. I love bringing worlds to life, especially writing plays that get performed.

On and front, I wrote my first play in 2012-ish, and seeing this world brought to life spark something in me. Since then I have written seven or eight plays.

Sometime around 2013 I met my mentor in person, and something in that meeting and his words from his books spark and renewal. I started writing more, and after a while started concentrating on editing and revision of my previous writings. I had SO MANY already written that needed work and could be better and ultimately published.

But recently-about 2016 through 2017-the lack of progress and a shifting focus on what I what has made me realize that I am a good writer, a writer that deserves to be published. So, after I started on two new projects in 2017, I thought that maybe I can just publish my own works. I began taking my projects seriously; researching the independent publication of a children's book, courting artists, writing podcast scripts for a new story idea, courting a composer, and making plans for both of these projects. I have had to change my time tables a lot in the last year, but I am more confident and making more progress to making these a reality. I also realized that I could do a smaller Kickstarter and take some of my completed works and publish a literary magazine through crowdfunding.

What does this mean?

Well, 2017 was about developing ideas and editing/revising my work. 2018 is putting those ideas/projects into action.

I realized that you can never succeed if you don't try, and even if you fail in the process, you still learn something.

Time for action!

Introducing Here, There be a Writer's "Stories to be Told", my Kickstarter, which is live. I am hoping to raise $1,100 dollars to cover publishing costs and writer expenses to help launch my writing career.

Please have a look, maybe donate some if you can, Dear Readers. Share my little dream, so I can make  my dreams come true.